The other day I was frustrated as hell.
Every room I walked in had someone stuff strewn about in the improper place with no effort to actually clean it up. The laundry needed to be folded, the dishwasher needed to be unloaded and reloaded, the floor had crumbs strewn about from the little hands carrying them about the house AND I needed to unpack from the work day and prep tonight's dinner and tomorrow's lunches and meals. Plus, the list I had been compiling throughout the day was left untouched at work AND at home (think wrapping stockings, renewing passports, ordering gifts, checking flights, sending emails, planning, copying...). Then, the kids starting ASKING me for things. Things I didn't have time for. MORE. MORE. MORE.
I wanted to cry. In fact, I almost did.
Sometimes, as a working mother (or a stay at home mother!) it is hard to find yourself underneath all the responsibility, expectations, and duties. The housework, professional duties, and raising a family. That is a lot in itself. It is no wonder we have an easy time losing our independence and the ability to define ourselves.
When is the last time someone asked you "Who is ________ (insert your name)" and you didn't answer with mother, wife, _______ (insert profession). We forget who we are because we don't allow ourselves the time we deserve or the time to immerse ourselves in self-centered activities.
My "selfish" activity is lifting weights. I love it. It is a time where I feel empowered, strong, beautiful, and I find RELEASE from the day. My kids are trained to leave me ALONE during that hour. And- SURPRISE! The duties you need to tend to didn't go anywhere and will still get done.
Instead- you GAVE yourself that time to decompress.
Have you ever been resentful for your significant other "always" leaving to fish, hunt, exercise, watch football, etc... In the mean time, they don't bat an eye at the housework? I think we can learn a very VALUABLE lesson from them.
WE MUST TAKE CARE OF OURSELVES TO BE HAPPY.
I said it. Mr. F always reminds me life goes to quickly, don't mind the mess, and it will all still get done. My kids are little, my mind and body are invaluable, and HE IS RIGHT. (Don't tell him I admitted that!)
So, my hope for all of you mothers (or fathers!) who feel that they have lost their independence and you need to be able to define who you are once again- please come join us.
Give yourself an hour.
Then remind yourself the best days you have are when you slow down and just BE.